Jewells of Thought

It has been a long time… doubts and busyness have overtaken my thoughts and my time. I still can’t believe it’s May, nearly half of the year is now gone. During this entire time there has been an undercurrent to post, but my energy was depleted by the time I would have been able to actually type and post one.

There has been a noticeable change recently where the urge to share has been frothing over in my thoughts. Ideas that feel that God is nudging me to share again, but my hobbies and the relaxing feel of my hands on the sewing machine, with the needle and thread or even cleaning as the past 3 months at my grandparents home where my uncle still lives has won out. Cleaning, cleaning and more cleaning has been my life in order to fulfill a need to adapt to my family’s needs. In doing so though I have found the actions of housekeeping, at least in part, at Mamaw’s House comforting.

However, it’s not all a bed of roses. Dementia is frustrating, but I have a difficult time sometimes even saying the “A” word which is so much worse. Then I realize looking back, how blessed my family was that my Alsman grandparents didn’t have to deal with either of those words before their death to any real extent.

Yesterday was a powerful day for me. It was my Mom’s Mother’s Day Banquet at her church. Something was different for me I can’t quite peg what it was confidence or less confidence. I wore a dress with tennis shoes something I would never have done before on purpose. My injury though was awakened this week after the massive rain once again. So my foot has been in pain most all week.

I knew my footwear would be an issue so I had to confront it. Somehow an idea I never would have put together before emerged. I had a dress that had the same shade of pink as one pair of my sneakers. I bought these sneakers when I worked at Dialysis and forgot the rule about no mesh. There’s mesh in these sneakers so I couldn’t wear them to work. I wore them more after this job. Yesterday I realized that pair of shoes matched this dress then the more I looked I had a cardigan that matched the green of my shoes and a pair of earrings that also matched. It all came together.

My outfit even kind of blended in with the theme of the day. Butterflies. This is where I knew I needed to start writing again at the banquet from all the little “Godwinks” that happened.