Jewells of Thought

Last week one of the reasons why it was busy and emotional was because it was my family’s first time back in therapy. Real therapy at Catherine Hamilton albeit I am sure some patients may not be sure the quantifier ‘real’ is absolutely true. Okay maybe that person who is not the patient is me.

That day last week was a bit harrowing. I have my own memories, but I know Mom also has hers. The day however, was for my brother. The fact that he fought going only underscored all of our emotional scars from having to be at this facility in Sullivan.

One of the most pointed and confounding comments given to me still irks. The issue at the time with my Mom and I was our lack of time with our young girl. I was told to combat our mixed emotions of having to fight for her attention with the most insensitive remarks I have ever heard from a licensed therapist and doctor. Of course I was single and she had the audacity to suggest I simply find a man and have a baby. As if it was just that simple and easy to do so and that would solve all our problems in this situation.

Please tell me you see as many fallacies as I do to this statement. God works in His own time first of all. I am glad I was the one who heard this and not someone younger and naive to go out and actually respond to this suggestion. From the moment I heard this I couldn’t believe it came out of her mouth she no longer works around here fortunately. Instead when my brother was needing help the most she left us without having a plan for him in the works.

We had all trusted her until this moment in time. We had pretty much trusted Catherine Hamilton until this moment. We are now skeptical of everything like the process of therapy over zoom. We are not big fans after what we have been through it only made things worse.

So when we walked up to that door I had to take a slow breath. I wasn’t sure any of us were ready to trust them again. Honestly, I don’t think we do yet a week later.

Words matter. Not everyone is in a frame of mind to understand or able to adequately respond the way the initial person expected. Schizophrenia and Bipolar disorders and these are not the only ones I have had to learn over the years that have trigger words that set off red alarms. For the person living it and the relative or friend just trying to help. Words on Facebook like a whole Church going against a person not knowing the full scope of the situation is quite disheartening. I’m trying to reverse some of the horrible scars that one church created by showing my brother not all churches are like that.

Words though matter… and their words stung deep. I have been able to show him that Pleasantville Community Church and Fellowship Baptist Church both churches are incredibly important to our family are not like that infamous church.

Churches need to be mindful that their words and actions just like that Therapist’s comments are not the right look for them. They are supposed to be living on the Word of God as the leadership of that church and be adults not a baby still needing to be nursed with milk.

Remember to be careful with the advice and words you give. Where is the authority behind these answers coming from! A Godly wisdom or a worldly wisdom!