Jewells of Thought

There are some days when things seem off. Wednesday was that day for me. It was a week later after the assassination so I just imagine what his family feels like. I didn’t even meet him and he made such an effect, but that wasn’t solely my dysfunction.

A couple of days later I realized what my trouble was, I believe. However, not before my boyfriend that I was trying to isolate from him. One of the phrases he said was that I needed to be an adult. For some reason I couldn’t explain to myself what I was feeling let alone to him. We have no secrets, but I just didn’t know how to articulate my lack of emotions.

Simply I just needed to zone out I guess. He took it the opposite way. So we had to text our way out of that misunderstanding. Although sometimes I get so exhausted from texting I just want to fast-forward to when we can be together. It was a sad day I just needed to get through.

Fortunately, we talked through it and were able to make amends. We talked through the adult comment and are on the same page about it. Wednesday night reminded me that it was Prayer Meeting Night and my churches don’t do them on Wednesday’s. So Mom and I have been talking about our going through the Ladies of the Bible book studies we have looked at together through the years. I think this was the urge I needed to restart our Bible journey only this time we will go through the other book we haven’t started. It’s called the ‘Wicked Women of the Bible’. The same author who put together the ‘Ladies of the Bible, also put this book out, we just have not gotten to this book and it has gotten dusty in the years it hasn’t been read.

So Monday I am looking forward to starting this book study. That feeling unnerved me for some reason. I didn’t like it, but didn’t want to blame it on Charlie’s death a week ago. I do think God has been goading me to get back into these book studies though.

Bryan and I have made it through worse misunderstandings. He knows as I do, that when we stop communicating, that we begin a slippery slope towards problems. He has my heart and has shown me such love and he’s cherished our relationship from the get go. He is my amazing man. I’m hoping looking through these women and some of the bad decisions they made will make more of an impression of how to deal differently than they did. Although I have to say calling Eve a wicked woman for taking the bite of the forbidden fruit seems a bit too much doesn’t it! However sin is sin at the same time no matter who you are.