Jewells of Thought

Goodness not quite a month ago was Thanksgiving Day. Though it does feel like a long month ago. On that very night on Great American Family the true story of Longfellow’s poem was debuted. Simply called “I Heard The Bells.”

This moving film was broadcast with no commercials. This was also the day my parents and I were visiting my brother up in Indy for the first time since he had arrived there late sometime the Saturday before. It was a long few days not knowing how he was doing or how the facility was treating him. It was a difficult first few days of separation. So I wasn’t sure we would even be home to watch this film, but I had recorded it to make sure I wouldn’t miss it.

Thankfully we did make it home long before the show began. Our visit was actually short and very bittersweet since my brother was obviously not feeling good and really needed some rest and some upset stomach medicine. Still it was distressing only getting that short time with him, but also realizing nothing had changed in the past 5 days. Despair was felt by all of us, yet we had hope it would change.

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow is an intriguing man. His words were the rallying call for the Civil War yet he didn’t want his sons to be mixed up in the war. Before the agony of what the Civil War would bring his son the horrific event of losing his wife was nearly too much to bear. Despair again takes over the hearts of God’s people.

Yesterday after a month of thinking about this song a new perspective came to life for me. When I first thought about performing this song I wanted to also play the clarinet, but after the past month and feeling my left wrist slowly being to writhe in pain once again I thought it prudent this past week to forgo that part and simply sing the song against Brenda’s accompaniment. I won’t say that I am over the butterflies, but I have noticed performing here at Grandma’s church the butterflies seem to flutter away at performance day.

Could it be experience or simply getting older and not allowing myself to get all caught up in the what if I miss this note or that one! Plus I know these songs really well through playing and singing them throughout the past 10 years, yet this song ‘I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day’ is the first time I have sung this as a solo. One time Mom and I played this as a duet many years ago at Fellowship for the Christmas Program. Maybe because it is such a beloved Hymnal song it just felt natural to sing. Either way singing it yesterday even with holding the microphone in my right hand felt so special after having seen a glimpse of what Henry was writing about. Losing the love of his life and yet knowing she was with God. His loss was God’s gain, but he would not lose her completely; only until they would meet again years later.

Being able to sing for Grandma has been such a special way to give back to her in a way. I was discussing with a friend from church that she was indeed a piece of why I am able to sing. Unfortunately I can’t remember verbatim what he said except that it was beautiful and he was complimenting me for the song. As did many others there is just a spirit of family and church family that ascends the boundaries and it’s such an incredible feeling of home to have in my Dad’s childhood church.

Like Longfellow and his family we all deal with hardships. The difference between those saved and those who are not is that God has promised to be with us. One must ask Christ to enter his or her heart first. Henry’s wife had and is why when she was stuck in that burning dress unable to get help in those moments whatever pain she felt was gone just like that when she next opened her eyes.

Despair is painful for a time, but Christians always have a hope in God.