Learning is continual. Even this week, as frustrated as I have been, with failures and disappointments, I see this maturing relationship. Bryan lets me vent when my quota is up to… steaming, then he firmly and as non-sugary gives me his thoughts. He is rarely off on his points. There are still times I think my frustrations will be too much for him to deal with.
Yet his love is more encompassing than sometimes my narrow brain can contemplate. Our relationship has had challenges like everyone else has had with some added long-distance and online complications. We have only begun to understand the many facets of each other and we are eager to learn more together. For some reason, in the back of my mind… I have been afraid that I could still lose him with some of the craziness I have poured out in some of my tangents of worry and stress.
We have said it to each other… over and over to each other about never wanting to lose each other. Yet there are times it doesn’t hit me until I push a text through to him. Seeing his messages one by one after one of these stressed tests of mine reminds me how connected we are and that I need to stop doubting his affirmed love. I am still learning to trust, but he has earned my trust and vice versa. I have to stop letting doubts creep in. God has been in this from the first week we both initiated our first texts.
We both do look forward though to learning and growing as a couple in person at some point this year.
Jewells of Thought 
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