Jewells of Thought

Starting on Wednesday some memories began hitting me. The question of what I was doing last year right before Thanksgiving… well it nearly took me back to that frustration I had almost forgotten.

Last year I was working the not so glamorous job of a Patient Care Technician at a Dialysis Clinic. I was so busy I didn’t really have a life outside of this job. Days off if there were not more than one weren’t worth the time off. Anyhow I specifically remember being the last staff member out of the Clinic that day. I actually met the new cleaning service man and he was very nice and more efficient than the previous couple we had had in recent weeks.

This job was unlike anything I thought I would ever want to do. It is a bit of a calling. Early mornings and not afraid of blood. Sometimes I think my love for history and knowing how brutal war could be at times through reading and through movies prepared me for the amount of blood I would be around. The idea of blood didn’t scare me. In fact I had gotten pretty good at cleaning up blood.

I really wanted this job and I worked so hard to pursue this from Davita to Fresenius and yet I was put in different situations… that left me questioning myself.

Last year and this year could not be more different for me. I was so tired, but I had a paycheck and yet the biggest change for me was taking a risk. I took a risk in this position working in Illinois for a time and traveled by myself. I was so grateful Joy and I shared a room at Mount Vernon, but when I lost her the second week I had to suck it up and continue on. I came back the third week and finished this training only to be sabotaged the following week at my own clinic. However, it was absolutely a victory for me to be at Mount Vernon and succeed even by myself.

Yet here I am a year later… blogging again. My life is different I’m not exhausted from the hours of an early job or the late hours. I rarely write late anymore since I have a routine. God sends me heavenly nudges and I write based on those not to forget the outside of the box ideas and story within the story thoughts of mine.

Life is calmer in ways… yet I still wonder what God is doing in my life. I can’t help but analyze things I know my time in Dialysis had a purpose. Writing also brings me purpose and healing not to mention the love of documenting history as it’s happening. History was not something in my life until one event and now I can’t hide from my task as a historian and journalist.

There were times last year the urge to read or write was so tempting yet I was so tired to do anything else, but work and everything work related to getting ready for work on my days off. As much as I knew I was helping others last year this year has been incredible watching my blog grow and articles being read by lots of people.

Do you take time for self-inspection? Sometimes I know I do it too much at times.